Destory All

by Strange Monsters

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05:39
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03:40
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05:33
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04:45
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03:53
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04:19

about

© 2016 Strange Monsters
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"...bringing wry, quirky lyrics...and a talk-sing style reminiscent of Camper Van Beethoven." ~Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

"...enjoyably aggressive, straightforward rock music with great guitar riffs and atypical topics." ~Sound Scene Express

"Five minutes after the song is over, the chorus is still stuck in your head." ~Pittsburgh CityPaper

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released October 1, 2016

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Strange Monsters Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

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Track Name: Optimus Minor
I was feeling useless
Uninspired and pointless
Like I was living my life without rigor
Without vigor
And I wondered if this was how
Optimus Prime’s little brother felt
On the schoolyard when all the kids shouted
They shouted for…

Optimus Prime! Optimus Prime!
Optimus Prime! Optimus Prime!
Optimus Prime! Optimus Prime!
Optimus Prime! Optimus Prime!

Well here’s a song for Optimus Minor
For all you Optimus Minors out there
Yeah, you know who you are
If you’ve ever felt the shadow cast upon you
From the light of so many others
Rendered you small
Like an ant in the tall grass
Well, it’s time to unplug from the mainframe
Unplug from the mainstay
Let the light of sun fall on your hair
And sing…

Optimus Mi-, Optimus Mi-mi-mi-mi
Optimus Mi-mi-mi-mi, Optimus Minor!
Optimus Mi-, Optimus Mi-mi-mi-mi
Optimus Mi-mi-mi-mi, Optimus Minor!
Track Name: Don't Wanna Pay
I was walking through the supermarket
Just the other day
Perusing the seafood counter
Admiring jumbo shrimp and wild caught fillets
Asking myself, Why should I pay?
In this metropolis of sustenance
Just another unfair system of governance
I would take that would be my fate
Like a bankrupt bounty hunter, like IG88

Burritos in the freezer aisle - no way!
Baked Lays on the chips shelf - no way!
Canned sardines by the Goya products - you’ve gotta be kidding me!

I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
For anything today!

A giant butt steak the size of your face
What would Morrissey say?
Make you feel alone and disgraced
And all your past transgressions
Come back to slap you in the face
Like low sodium soy sauce and Top Ramen without MSG
Yeah, I've made some mistakes
Maybe I'll make some more today

Packets of Beef Stroganoff - no way!
Cinnabon with artificial flavors - no way!
Two day old rotisserie chicken - you’ve got to be kidding me!

I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
For anything today!

I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
I don’t want to pay
For anything today!
Track Name: Things
I was sitting in Dr Kevorkian Jr’s office the other day
Waiting for my appointment
And I started looking through a stack of magazines
And I saw a magazine I’d never heard of before
So I opened it up and started reading it
And found out all sorts of things I never knew before
Such as the bullet that shot JFK was the very same bullet
That killed Kurt Cobain three decades later
It had never landed
It just kept going around and around the earth
And also that the Scrooge ducklings
Screwy, Duey, and Louie -- they weren’t even really brothers
It was just a ruse put on by Disney
And I found out that governments lie
And corporations lie
And the media lies
And people lie to each other and I didn’t know who to believe

There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you

Then I found out that the weather is a weapon
Yes it’s a weapon and it’s way out there in the middle of the Pacific Ocean
Where no one can find it
And it’s guarded by all these giant warships
And airplanes that circle around all day
To make sure no one finds out about this weather weapon
But the thing is, it’d be really calm and sunny everyday
But there’s this machine and what it does
Is it creates rain and hail and ice and sleet and storms and volcanic eruptions
Well maybe not volcanic eruptions
Because I’m pretty sure those have been around a lot longer than the weather machine
Like maybe millions of years or a billion or 2 billion years but anyway
It causes all these other problems and it keeps us from knowing the truth about anything
Because we’re always distracted by this big weather problem

There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you

Then I read that the moon landings were fake
They were staged
They were shot in a studio outside of Malibu
And all these big time Hollywood directors were there
And all these big time Hollywood producers were there
And they had to fill out all these forms that said classified and confidential
But the military went and threatened their families
So they couldn’t say anything about it anyway
But the thing is there really are people who live on the moon
There are people who live in these big crazy domes
And we can’t see them from earth
Because they’re on the dark side of the moon
That we never landed on but we never landed on any side of the moon
And there are people who are up there who are not like us
But they are people who are like us
Because they used to live on earth thousands of years ago
Before we were people
But now they’re just people who live on the moon
And they’re not lizard people
Because they're people who gave rise to people like us
And oh yeah, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens, aliens

There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you
There are some things they will never tell you
Track Name: Retro Boy
Oh foreign princess bite your tongue
(You know) he’s knocking up your daydreams with his ray-gun
And he’s so empty, he’s so empty in his bones
Yeah, you say, but you really dig his wardrobe
But I’m awake, I’m awake, in the middle of the night
I swear I can’t tell how late all the kids on the fire escape
Go "La da da di da da Voltron"

Oh retro, oh boy-o
Oh he’s so retro boy
Oh retro, oh boy-o
Oh he’s so retro boy

And you say you’re too young to be bought
When I tell you I’m too old to be sold
He’s an outdated imitation of a past-life
Imitation of blase strife
It’s not the same, it’s not the same, it’s not the same, you say,
Outmoded, corduroy, dilettante, passé
And all the kids on the fire escape
Go "La da da di da da Voltron"

Oh retro, oh boy-o
Oh he’s so retro boy
Oh retro, oh boy-o
Oh he’s so retro boy

Imitation of life
Imitation of strife
Take me to Ikea
Sleep under florescent lights
You’re too young for buying
I’m too old for selling
You’re too young for buying
I’m too old for selling...
Track Name: Gawker
Inside every man is a giant purple gorilla
That he tries to keep satiated with peanuts and bananas
And a man’s biggest fear is that his giant purple gorilla
Will one day escape its cage

A rainy night on the North Side of Pittsburgh
Cops are listening to the Pirates game on the radio
Under a mustard -colored bridge, a man with one arm
Slices through a prostitute’s heart

And all the homeless people know the guy who did it
They say he’s her father but her momma says he isn’t
And the rain tap tap tap tap taps out a broken melody
Then, shots fired on the Mexican War Streets

I said go but drive by real slow
I said go but talk real low
I said go but drive by real slow
Cause I wanna see what they did to him

They said he had a high concentration of the old ultra violence
Maybe it too much Clockwork orange
Maybe too many police dramas
Maybe he ate too many processed foods
And not enough vitamins
Then again, maybe he was just dehydrated

But inside every man is a giant purple gorilla
That he tries to keep satiated with peanuts and bananas
And a man’s biggest fear is that his giant purple gorilla
Will one day escape its cage

I said go but drive by real slow
I said go but talk real low
I said go but drive by real slow
Cause I wanna see what they did to him
Yeah I wanna know what they did to him
I gotta see what they did to him
Yeah I gotta know what they did to him
Track Name: Oxford Coma
I slipped into an Oxford coma
Too many strippers, JFK, and Stalin
Didn’t know what to eat for breakfast
Scrambled eggs or members of my lineage
And why should punctuation
Turn one into a cannibal?
Why should I get so grammatical?
They’re just marks on paper, right?

I guess some people just believe
What they want to believe
I guess some people just see
What they want to see

I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake

I read about a man
Who was in a coma for 60 years
He had visions, so many visions
Foresaw major events before they unfurled
Some say it was a TV left on inadvertently
Near his hospital room
It was all just subliminal suggestion
What other explanation could there be?

I guess some people just believe
What they want to believe
I guess some people just read
What they want to read

I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake
I’m half asleep, I’m half awake

And I’m not gonna break
OK, I will just break a little bit…Go!
Track Name: Spider-Man
Spiderman didn't love Mary Jane
He thought her selfish, vapid, and insane
But he got on with her after his true love died

He didn't know that people could change
That masks worn on the outside weren't the same
As the masks one kept hidden inside

Oooo, ooo, ooo

Spiderman always wanted to flee
From what he was and was expected to be
But he got on with it, just like you will one day

Don't be afraid of what you are
Dark city streets, or porcine crime lords
You'll find no comfort when their broken spirits fall

And remember, this is your story too
Don't be confused by the metaphors they'll use
Just listen to the sound of your heart carrying you back home

Oooo, ooo, ooo

Don’t let metal tentacles wrap the dark around you
Just keep the door cracked and let the light in

Spiderman didn't love Mary Jane
He thought her selfish, vapid, and insane
But he got on with her after his true love died
Track Name: Chinese Room
In a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening

Little slips of paper
Say what I should be saying
Little slips slid under the door
Say what I should be thinking
Little slips, little slips of paper
Say what I should be feeling
But all the things they’re saying
Mean nothing to me

I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
And all the things they’re saying
Mean nothing to me

I go to work in the morning
And I come home in the evening
I brush my teeth in the mirror
And I rest my head on a pillow
But all day my brain’s been floating
In an empty cup of coffee
Cause all the things they’re saying
Mean nothing to me

I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
I'm in a Chinese room in the morning
Chinese room in the evening
And all the things they’re saying
Mean nothing to me

Da da da-da-da, da da da-da-da
Track Name: Zartan
Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?
Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?

Master of disguise
You can see it in his eyes
The pain he hides behind
To change the skin he lives inside

Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?
Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?

Stares down his reflection
Cheap hotel mirror
Revolver on the bureau
Next to a half-empty bottle of mescal
Imagines his frenemies
Vanquished in ash below him
Focuses on a dilated pupil
Feels his facade begin to crumble
And he is no longer Zartan
Now, he is just a man
And he is no longer Zartan
Finally, he is just a man

Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?
Hey, hey, Zartan!
What you hiding from, man?

Hey, hey, hey, hey!
Track Name: El Capitan
Oh El Capitan
Come down to the parade today
Don’t celebrate the old ways
The world’s been discovered for so long

Oh El Capitan
They still throw candy in the street
It lands at the children's feet
So they don’t see the sky on fire

But there’s a light that shines
It shines on all of us
Like on the day we were born

Oh El Capitan
Tonight the pharmacy is empty
All the kids run wild on the beach
Looking for stars inside the waves

But you and I hope
That their spirits forever grow
No matter how far they dive
Into the murky deep

Cause there’s a light that shines
It shines on all of us
Like on the day we were born

Oh El Capitan
I’m so tired of trying
Wish I had the strength to invite you inside
These walls of insomnia

But the one key, it was taken long ago
Now it’s buried in the sand
On some long forgotten shore

But there’s a light that shines
It shines on all of us
Like on the day we were born